In Retrospect ….

Lets just jump right into it….

I’ve learned a lot about myself over these few past weeks. And of course with everything that you come to terms with, or in my case at least, its never a walk in the park.

1. I’m not as strong as I thought, turns out will-power has a direct link to your heart…. and my hearts a bitch

2. NEVER, under ANY circumstances share yourself with anyone. Only a few care, the rest are just curious. Trust me on this.

3. It’s harder to forgive and forget. I guess I just got to the point where being numb and indifferent can only last so long. Once you’ve been taken advantage of, shit on, and thrown under the bus it gets harder to forget the names and faces of the feelings.

4. I honestly don’t give a damn about half of the things I should …. Does that make me detatched and shrewd? And is it sad that I really don’t care the answer…. ?

5. I’d rather be alone to myself than risk someone raining on my parade. At least when your an escapist you can put flowery words with otherwise realist faces. Would it kill people to show some common courtesy?

6. I miss my dog. I really do get along more with animals than i do people… I have horrible trust issues, yet they work in a roundabout way. I tend to trust to easily. But I’ll never show it…  I have this strange tendency to sort of absorb people. Its like taking empathy and intuition and multiplying that by one thousand. I don’t just feel the other person, its like i take on whatever it is they are, so you see how difficult it is to try and handle things objectively. Nothing in my life is ever black and white.

7. After number five, I have to wonder is that really healthy. When I get rehabilitated back into the world, I seem to loose all sense of communication skills. Thus making me feel socially awkward thus making me turn more into a recluse. Is there really a way to fight a pattern like that?

8. Astral Projection. There are six red doors.

9. I have a terrible need to be private. In all aspects of my life, even the ones other would deem silly. My security and my privacy comes above anything else to me.

10. I care far too much, wearing your heart on your sleeve isn’t cool. Its redundant.

….That felt amazing to get off my chest… even if it is to a blog. Enjoy your Easter everyone.



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